My first night angels on Grindr 
call me a good little monkey 
I think, that’s a little fucked up 
We laugh me & the [other] guy who wants 
to fuck my small smooth confuse of 
a corpse. In the car door because 
He’s into cars (he’s a man, don’t 
you see?) my nakedness warps mirage
deflates I have to leave goodnight. 
ETA afternoon thru dust & 
protests we laugh at: free Billy 
the elephant! He solders his hand 
to my hand smiles brushes my thigh 
stomach shivers. Billy doesn’t have 
a voice! Dust & spider monkey 
shitting out its pink tip colon 
It’s as close to that as I’ll ever 
get & I sweat thanking [God] the sun 
We linger by the elephants Bill, 
good ol’ Billyboy isn‘t there 
My first evening squeezing between 
beasts he leads me into sweaty 
bathroom but I cannot piss not 
in the presence of real men I 
cannot piss but for a miracle if, 
I imagine my hairless penis 
A respectable thing. A grey trunk.
shriveled snail of a sack droopy 
& tired as I am? I still can.
not. piss. He crawls under the stall 
on the prowl or something I laugh 
Let me help you it’s as close as 
he’s ever gotten to spelunking 
down there red ass tailbone ice cold   
Moses, spread my wetness, I think 
for his sake Please Master & all that
He luxuriates cheek to taped-
up chest dust in the bladder drips 
Let’s go back to the ID.4 he 
has my hands the protestors gone 
nonverbal like me & Billy.